The bigger picture.

Posted: August 21, 2009 in Of Life, Of New Things, Things From My Heart
Tags: , , ,

Have you ever had days where you just feel like everything you do seem worthless, like no matter how much you do, it’s not good enough to meet expectations, to get what you want, to be the best..No matter what, you’re just that little bit off the mark..basically, you’re just discouraged and you wanna give up..I just had one of those few days back..

Was studying for my summative exams on that fateful day when I suddenly realise that I can’t finish every single lecture, I can’t even try..It’s just so impossible and at that moment, I felt like giving up..there are other things that I’ve yet to settle, so many pending “assignments” and I just feel like leaving everything behind and escape somewhere..and then, I received something..

UltrasoundNo, it’s not mine.

Say hello to my nephew/niece to be..To make the post easier, I’ll pretend it’s a boy ok? and if it happens to be a girl, I’ll come back and change..=) Words can’t express the joy I felt when I saw this picture..I don’t know how to explain, but it somehow came at just the right time and it really encouraged me in a way that I’ve never felt before..In a somehow matured and adult way..It got me thinking about the baby, how he’s gonna be like, who is he gonna look like and stuff..and then it led to..What kind of auntie will I be to him? What kind of legacy will I be leaving for him? What are we, as people of this generation, doing to help the next generation?

And that really stirred up this spirit of just wanting to be the best that I can ever that one day when he’s going through what I’m going through now, I can tell him that he’ll make it, without being a total hypocrite..that maybe one day, just maybe, he’ll say “when I grow up, I wanna be just like you..” it brought me to a place where I could see a piece of the bigger picture, of why we’re doing the things we’re doing’s for them..we’re running this race now, charting new paths, going through different challenges so that in the future they can follow us, run along with us and hopefully someday, run ahead of us and do even greater things..and because of that, I won’t give up..I will hold on to this baton, and I will pass it on..

“Hey you, don’t even know what your name’s gonna be yet but thanks. Even though you’re only 7.73cm big right now, you’ve already made a difference in my life..Just like how your dad has always been there for me at just the right time, you’ve done that for me this time..Wow, you’re already following in his footsteps..haha..I can’t wait till you come into this world although I think it’ll be safer in there but I know you’re gonna grow up to be a great person..I hope you’ll read this one day when you feel discouraged and know that you’re awesome, even since u were only 7.73cm..I hope that I’ll be cool and you’ll like me, and I’m sure you’ll love our family cos I’d never trade it for any other family in the world..Be safe, and I’ll see you soon! =D  Much love, Eunice.”

  1. Fran says:

    OH WOW. Kim’s preg?!

    CONGRATS GABRIEL AND KIM! (if they even read this) lol…

    anyway, i’m sure you’re gna make the best auntie ever.
    =) no doubt about that..
    damn, now i’m scared my kids may like you more than they like me. hahahaha..

    ps: keep going! you now have a little Gabrim/Kabriel cheering u on =))

  2. GabrielPui says:

    Eunice ku-ku… hahaha.. sounds so old la.. but that’s the truth la.. the baby will call u that. so be ready la.. dont worry too much ya.. in this life, we only need to do our best and God will take care of the rest.

    my new “assignment” is going to last for the next many year from now.. raising up the next generation and see them successful in life.. how am i going to do it? i also dunno but only keep trusting in God la.. (so far never fail la..)

    Fran, thanks a lot! i do read her blog. and yours too.. hahahaha…
    Wah.. now only i see.. u already try to name my kid… hehe…

  3. siauying says:

    AUNTY Eunice!!! x)

    I often feel not-good-enough, my best never seem to be the best, worthless etc. but one thing i learnt is that God never asks us to be ‘good’ (like how we/the world define good – perfect results, know everything…), He asked us to be ‘faithful’ instead. He looks at our hearts, not results.
    It’s good to want to do our best to glorify God, but if we get too uptight and being too hard on ourselves, sometimes we get negative effect instead.
    All these stretching… uncomfortable as it is, will make u a better aunty. oh i mean, doctor. 🙂

    whatever i told u, i’m reminding myself too.

    one intern told me few days ago, what do they call the person who comes out last in class in med school? …. A DOCTOR!!

    so, cheers and enjoy studying! =)

  4. eunicepui says:

    Fran : They’ll like you more la,with your burping all, you’ll be the coolest weirdest mom..hahaha! When are your kids coming?? Is there something I should know?! See, we told you that you’ll be the first one to get married..=P

    Koko : you can do it! I believe you’ll be a great dad..Thanks ko, you always know what to say to make me feel better =)

    SiauYing : Hey!! How’re you doing since the last time i chatted with you? Thanks for the encouragement, it’s good to know that you’re not alone and someone actually has gone through the same thing and they understand..I’ll TRY to enjoy studying =P

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