6 Months

Posted: May 16, 2010 in Of Life, Things From My Heart

that’s all the time I have left in IMU Bukit Jalil. and I will do everything I can to make this 6 months count, to reach as many medical students, pharmacists, nutritionist, etc.

I will not back down, I will not let the enemy tell me that I’m just like everyone else, because I’m not. I will fight to the end, I will stand my ground, I will do it even if I were the only one left.

I want to see a new breed of medical students..the future doctors of this nation..I will not compromise and I will not make excuses nor live a life lesser than what God wants to me live. And I will not let anyone who’s under my care buy into what the enemy has to say or do..give me back my students.

I want to see change. I want to BE the change. Lord, help me.

What comes first?

Posted: April 4, 2010 in Of Life, Things From My Heart
Tags: , , ,

Lately, with so many things going on, I’ve been feeling like I’m a “part-time-student”..I’m trying to revise and catch up with my studies and all but it hasn’t been easy..I can’t really stop doing the other things also cos those are the things that I want to do and am passionate about..so yeah, am definitely not in a very comfortable position..

but today, I sorta caught a revelation when I was in church..it IS true that I’m a part-time student..and you know why? because I’m a full-time disciple..everything that we do, say, think, etc. should be reflecting what we’re called to preach about ie Jesus! So what, if I don’t have the same amount of time to study like all my other classmates do? should I be fearful? No! because I believe and trust that if I put God first, He will look after me because He loves me and wants the best for me..He’s not putting me through all this to torture me, but to let me know that He’s made me for more than just “normal”, that I really CAN do all things through Christ who strengthens me. And I know that because I know Him.

So no matter what problems I have, in my studies, finances, relationships, I know that it’ll all be alright..All I gotta do is surrender and trust, listen and obey, and He’ll settle it for me..No one else can give me that assurance, except Him. No one else can make me feel safe, except Him. No one else can know what I really feel, except Him. And so, to no one else will I run to, except Him. I’ve come to realize and experience a whole new meaning of His love for me..just so amazingly awesome. =)

Just me and You, that’s enough for me.


My Dream.

Posted: March 8, 2010 in Of Change, Of Life, Things From My Heart
Tags: , ,

Since I was 7, I had this dream. A dream to become someone who’s wearing this white coat, had this alien looking thing hanging around my neck, someone who makes other people feel better and their family members happy, just like that someone whom I thought would save my grandma but couldn’t..I was young, I thought since he couldn’t do it, maybe I could try..since then, I’ve been trying, am still trying and will continue trying..not to save my grandma (I understand that now, of course) but to become that someone.

But in this past few years, my dream changed. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking..but hold on, story haven’t finish yet..In the past 2/3 years, I’ve experienced so much, I’ve been places, seen things and have come to realise that what I’ve been dreaming of all this while will not satisfy me..Yes, of course I want to get there and I’m really fighting hard to get there..come to think of it, in 3 and a half years’ time, I’ll start being that person..then what?? I just go on living the next 30 years like that? I don’t think so, there’s definitely more to life..

My dream…is to have a dream that’s bigger than myself..I don’t know what it is yet, but I know that He’s revealing it to me little by little..I’ve never really felt it this strongly before..I’ve always thought of something more..like a porridge shop next to the clinic (haha) and other things like that but this time it’s different..It’s more than just the hospital or work, it’s more than just those lives who’re physically ill and can afford treatment, it’s about the lives that are out there..I also don’t know how to explain..but all I know is, I’m in.

In this coming weeks and months, I’ve been challenged to do something that is totally out of my capacity as I know it but I’m ready..like Pr Kenneth said yesterday “if you don’t feel the pinch, it’s not faith” I’m already feeling it, may even be a punch instead of a pinch but I know that this is something I have to do..well, here’s to putting up the first piece of puzzle onto the bigger dream for the next 10 years..these small steps will determine if I’ll be able to make those big steps when the time comes..once again, I surrender. =)

“If you’re part of my family, reading this and worrying that I don’t want to be a doctor anymore..don’t worry, I’m still going to be one. It’s just something more than that. *smiles*”

Brain Farts.

Posted: January 20, 2010 in Of Life, Of Personal
Tags: , ,

feels like a very bloggy day..think I should unclog my mind but I can’t pour it all here..maybe just a little, I’ll try not to have mental diarrhea..haha..

1) it takes more effort to not think about it compared to just thinking about it, it shouldn’t be taking so much out of me..
2) I’m putting some things aside, on the shelf, whatever you wanna call it, it’s just not the right time..maybe one day? maybe not? we’ll just wait and see.
3) what’s wrong with just being friends?
4) I know where I am, I know what I want to do, but why do I always feel like I’m torn in between?
5) At times I wish that my classes started already, I’m feeling quite bored actually..want to do stuff but got nothing much to do, don’t have so much money to keep shopping also, feeling abit aimless..hmmm, maybe I just wanna go home..

Anyways, brain farts are fun..at least I get some things out..Time to look for things to do, I’ve never been good with just sitting still and not doing anything..gahhh!!! *runs around in circles*

It’s Official.

Posted: January 9, 2010 in Of Life, Of New Things
Tags: , ,

My holidays, I mean..Got my results for EOS 3 yesterday evening and I passed!! woohoo!! Praise God! couldn’t have done it without Him and all of you who prayed for me and walked with me through it..thank you. I’m actually excited about going to sem4 right now..we’ll see how long this excitement lasts..haha! Am updating from Kuching now, am here for a few days to attend my brother’s wedding..was in Kapit for a day and it was fun..I’ve always thought that Kapit feels like paradise, everytime I get there, time stops, perfect runaway spot =P

This is one of my favouritest fruit in the whole wide world..only found in Kapit, and it tastes AWESOME

Received something from a good friend of mine this morning and thought it’s pretty cool so I’m gonna share it with you all..

21.
Number of significance when you’re playing blackjack.
Number of times to repeat an act to break or form a habit.
Average number of days you are working in a month.
Exact total number of fingers and toes to qualify as weird.
The one in a lifetime when you officially and lawfully begin your life journey as an adult.
Congrats. May this year be your best year yet and a year of restful increase.

Here’s to an awesome holiday, a great semester 4 and an amazing year ahead. =D

On the first day of 2010…

I saw the first sunrise of the year. A bunch of us went up Broga Hill and it was awesome! Not a very challenging climb except that there were alot of people who were there with the same intention so we were stuck in human jam..Was the first to reach the first peak (3 peaks in total), and was super glad that I got there on time to catch the sun rise (I cheated a little on some parts, I ran up =P)..It meant SO much to me..Can’t really express how I felt at that moment but the significance, overwhelmed me a little..just standing there, taking a deep breath while the sun crept up, I was ready…ready to leave things behind, ready to cross over, into something new, into the unknown..but one thing I’m sure and I felt it right there and then, I’m loved.

2010, will be my last year in KL..one more year for me to see change, to impact someone’s life, to be different, to make a difference. Am I ready? I don’t know. I want to be. “Prepare me for what lies ahead, everything’s so uncertain but I know You have it all planned out, You know where this is going, help me stay on track.”

2010, I’ll be 21..the beginning of the “best years of my life” so they say..I hope I start well, I hope I can look back at this year and say I’m proud of myself..I’m sure there will be alot of changes,  things added into my life (like responsibilities and stuff la, stop thinking otherwise =P), things subtracted, multiplied and divided. It’s time to grow up, mentally, spiritually and emotionally..and to stop monkey-ing around..time to be more serious! haha.. “Please make me the person You want me to be, this year, help me be better..A better daughter, sister, friend, disciple, leader, classmate, etc. I want Your best for me.”

Just a few pictures I took..nice place..would love to go again soon..Happy New Year everyone..=)

New Year, New Life.

Posted: January 1, 2010 in Of Change, Of Life, Of New Things
Tags: , ,

As 2009 came to an end..couldn’t help but feel super relieved..I stood there, watching the fireworks, people and noise all around me, but in my head, in my heart, a thousand things went past and suddenly, it just felt like I could release them..like it’s just a mark in my history, like I could move on..and it felt great.

2009, was a very long and hard year for me…SO many things happened, both good and bad…some I can’t do anything about, some I wish I could undo and some I wish would never ever happen again..Looking back at the year, I’ve experienced so much, I’ve gained, I’ve lost and I’ve learnt so much..maybe one day I’ll look back at this year and be grateful for it but for now, in all honesty, I thought 2009 was one of the toughest year I’ve ever been through..and I’m just so glad it’s over..I’m really praying that 2010 will be much better than 2009..

As for resolutions..don’t think I’ll have any..but there are things that I wanna see in my own life this year..some changes, improvements, additions, subtractions..not convenient to reveal it here but yea, maybe I’ll share when we’re going into 2011..and see if I achieved any of the things..=P really looking forward to a whole new “life”..Welcome, 2010!! I’ve been waiting for you for quite some time now..Am glad you’re here..=)